I've been absent from this blog for the past three months because Randy has accepted a new job in a different town and we've been in the middle of trying to sell our house, pack, find a place to rent and move. I'll write more about our ridiculous adventures later but I didn't want to miss this chance to tell you about a very important book. (I don't have internet yet so I'm writing this on my phone—yikes!)
It Happens All the Time by Amy Hatvany is about a young woman who comes home from college, engaged and ready to start the next chapter of her life. While home Amber spends some time with her best friend from high school. Tyler has been a devoted and good friend for years. He knows all her struggles and triumphs. He gets her. They have a history together. At the 4th of July party, they've had too much to drink and begin to kiss. Amber tries to stop him, but Tyler rapes her. Devastated and conflicted and broken, Amber must face to realities of being raped by a trusted friend.
There's so much I want to say about this book. It's a topic that has been on my mind a lot lately. Randy had been attending Title IX training and there are cases in the news and even among those we know personally. He and I have had many discussions regarding this topic. There is a growing problem. As a mother of sons and daughters, I realize that not only must I teach my daughter about rape and trying to avoid it but I absolutely must teach my sons about consent.
One of the things that Hatvany does in her book is show that more often than not rapists are just normal guys. They often don't even think they've done anything wrong. They justify and use a plethora of excuses. This does not excuse them of their criminal and destructive actions. There are consequences that must be paid. But even better would be if men were taught and understood what rape really is. That no means no. We must teach our sons.
Hatvany explains this so much better than I can in her essay here : http://www.cosmopolitan.com/politics/a9192287/talking-to-my-son-about-sexual-consent/
Anyway, It Happens All the Time not only discusses an important topic but it is also a very readable novel with characters who are very real. Hatvany is an excellent author who focuses on character and plot while sharing a message.
It Happens All the Time by Amy Hatvany is published by Atria Books and released on March 28, 2017.